To blog or not to blog...
...that is the question. Whether tis nobler to write or just to read...
And read I do... but write? I write because... because its BBC blogging day.
Not really much to write about. Its too late to come up with something more witty than Shakespear...
Happy Blogging Day !
"I think I ..."
Last night I had a dream that was rather interesting.
I dreamt I was at Beulah camp, but that my sister and I went for a drive. We ended up meeting this rich family who had their home just down the river on the side of the mountain. We visited with them in their home, and the Dad was telling us all about the house and how it was engineered into the side of the hill. Now just as we were leaving my sister somehow tripped him, and he hurt his knee.
Before even calling the doctor, his wife got on the phone with their lawyer and got an estimate of 13 million for a settlement. I thought this was quite strange, and started to panick inwardly.
As his son was helping him into the car he said, "I think I have an ego problem."
I laid hands on him and prayed for his knee, but as I started to pray about his ego, it was as if my voice dried up...
I woke up knowing that God was to deal with "who" I am, not "what" I am. When I went on my last missions adventure we talked so much about how the "who you are in Christ is your greatest ministry." Another way it can be phrased is, "the greatest gift you can ever give anyone is your own personal relationship with Christ."
I've been struggling so much, an identity crisis of sorts. For much of my life I've been a student, and last year a pastor. With the tranisition happening at the church, I no longer have that title to define me. And as a solution, instead of focusing on my relationship with God, I've been trying to figure out the whats and the whens and wheres, but neglecting the who...
I've been focused on the knee, and not on the ego. I've been looking at the problem and not seeing how God is calling out to me in the midst of my circumstances to become more like Jesus.
Labels: dreams
for those of you on facebook...
...it was a classic case of guy saying what girl wanted to hear.
False alarm. I am no longer engaged.
I've been to the edge and back, but I survived.
Its never too late to walk away.
I'm so thankful for the relentless support of family, friends and the church.
I'm so thankful that prayer works.
I'm so thankful for a loving and gracious God.
"My flesh and my heart may fail,
but God is the strength of my heart
and my portion forever.
Those who are far from you will perish;
you destroy all who are unfaithful to you.
But as for me, it is good to be near God.
I have made the Sovereign LORD my refuge;
I will tell of all your deeds."
Psalm 73:26-28
Don't be afraid to ask me about my story. I want to tell about what God has done and is doing! He is in the business of redeeming His people for His purposes.
"Your job is the relentless pursuit of who God has made you to be. And anything else you do is sin and you need to repent of it." Rob Bell
Labels: life, relationships
A passover prayer
Jesus free me-
release me from myself.
from my broken and guarded state.
Heal me.
Holy Spirit let me know your love-
so close I can hear your heartbeat.
Daddy, oh Daddy-
holy. righteous. blameless.
not because of me.
You.
[ps. I also need $400 by Easter Sunday for my missions trip... but You already know that]
Labels: prayer
J2N
This weekend I had the amazing opportunity to attend Jesus to the Nations, a missions conference here in Halifax. The speakers this year were Don Richardson (Peace Child) and Wagdi Iskander (a converted Muslim).
All I can say it that it has been an amazing weekend. God has given me a lot to think about.
Please pray for me, as it means making decisions the concern my future. I plan on being in Halifax for a minimum of two-three years, but these are long range plans that in a sense have to be made now, so that the ball will be easier to get rolling when the time comes… things like saving for a vehicle, and possibly more education. I also need to be diligent with my language learning….
On my facebook I added the quote about how a visitor to a monastery was told, “If you need anything, let us know and we'll teach you how to live without it."
I found it slightly ironic when I entered the washroom and heard two teenage girls talking about straightners and how much time they had spent on their hair that morning. …Oh the boundless time and money and energy that Western teens have today. I’m glad we’re doing the 30 Hour Famine.
Labels: missions
"Something has got to give"
That's the line I've played over and over in my mind... "something has got to give."
At first I thought it might mean a change in location. Nope. I'm staying.
Then I thought it might mean a change in my job at Fabricville. Especially when I found out that I am not allowed to take a third (albeit unpaid) full week off for Beulah camp. My two weeks are going towards my MECA missions trip in May, which you can read about in my other blog. Leave a comment to get the link... One thing you can do is go to www.praygivego.com and give by credit card,
hint hint [but only if you are American]
Then on Tuesday night I had a paradigm shift and realized that the "something" is me. All I needed was a fresh and renewed perspective.
Now normally I go to church office on Tuesdays for staff meetings and office work, but instead I went to New Brunswick. My orginal plan was to attend the prayer and fasting retreat at Beulah. But when I found out that missions week, instead of being in April, was this week.... and that Mick was preaching... I just had to go!
The service started at 7:00 and wasn't really over until 9:30. Mick preached about how we are "Blessed to Bless" and it was his definition of blessing that really impacted me.
Blessing-
the privelege of knowing Jesus Christ. The key is what it means to me and how it causes me to live my life.
I was reminded that I am blessed so that I can love, so that I can pray, so that I can give, so that I can go...
I am blessed so sacrifice is not an issue for me and so that I have an eternal perspective.
So many things to think about, so many things that can't be expressed on blog.
So this morning (Thursday) I went to the office for an hour or so before heading to Fabricville. And as I was leaving I sorted through my inbox one last time. I found in an envelope that I had missed. Inside was an unusually and unexpected large cheque. I did a happy dance (the Wiedmaiers can confirm this).
I am so blessed. Blessed to have people who believe in me, and what God is doing in my life. Blessed so that I may share Jesus with others.
So I challenge you, if you are waiting for the "right" time to do what God has called you to... do it now. Don't wait until you have "enough" money or "more" time. That
never happens.
So give, give of yourself to the Master.
"Let's finnish the mission and go home!" -Veach
Labels: blessings, life, missions
A Great LORD's Day...
... and its not even over!
Last night I had the young adult group from my church over for chocolate fondue and games. It was an amazing evening. There were 15 of us, including baby Noah.
So I went to bed later than usual and I generally tend to guard my sleep, and calculate how many hours I would get... around 6..
[I aim for 8 each night].
Usually I would let this dictate my day, but when I hear that my boss has been up til 1:00 or 2:00 am and is still in the office at 6:00 or 7:00... I am ashamed at letting perceived tiredness be my excuse.
I've been listening to Erwin McManus (Mosaic Podcast, Destiny Disfunction) and reading Joyce Myer (Battlefield of the Mind), and through various conversations I have decided to take back my life.
I am tired of saying that I am tired!
I just want to be alive and awake!
So today while I only got up around 8:00, I made a concious decision to live life to the fullest.
My day has included:
- teaching children's Church
- talking to parents about VBS
- lunch and conversation with some of my church family
- going for a walk with my sister at the Dingle Tower
- realizing that it was still light out at 5:00 pm
- reading with that natural light still streaming in, while:
- listening to my room mate play piano
- a cat nap
- home made chai tea (fresh ginger, cardamum pods, and cinnamon sticks boiled for ten minutes, and plus a couple tea bags)
- a productive VBS meeting with one of my helpers
- cleaning out the fridge (on my list for forever)
- listening to some great music (taking a Sabbath break from my Lent's decision to give up extra-cirricular music for silence)
- blogging
- [NO tv]
... and its not even over!
Labels: life, Sabbath
